Practical tips for Leading with Emotional Intelligence

October 16, 2012 / Leadership / 0 Comments

Good morning everyone!  I have been having a great time meeting with my executive coaching clients this month.  The topic of the month is using emotional intelligence in leadership!  Leaders with high IQ do well; leaders with high EQ do way better and those with high Positivity along with the other two are the stars.  So, accordingly, my clients have asked for exercises to use “in the field of life” and here is one I adapted from Relly Nadler’s book, leading with emotional intelligence.  It goes like this:

1.   In any situation where you find yourself getting triggered ask yourself:

  • what am I thinking? “what is ____ thinking? I told ____ to .….”
  • what am I feeling? “I am so frustrated with ____ for not doing what they are supposed to”
  • what do I want? “I want ____ to do what I said!”
  • how am I getting in my own way?
  • what do I need to do differently?

2.  An interesting way to use this tool is to apply it in situations where you are handling things really well too:

  • what just took place that I can celebrate?
  • what am I feeling? “proud, satisfied, grateful,…”
  • how does what happened match with what I want?
  • how did I contribute to this outcome?
  • In what way have I grown to get to this place?

3.  Write in your journal each week – one or two examples of the above

I look forward to hearing how this experience was for you!


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